“Be a calm beholder of what is happening around you.” ~Bruce Lee
Here’s a hypothetical dialogue between two friends. One that, though hypothetical, represents something that happens to every one of us almost daily at work, at home and throughout the various interactions of our day.
A: “Let me show you something I recently learned in class! It’s awesome!” (A proceeds to show B an interesting step and kick combination)
B: “Oh, I know this, I have done it many times. My Sifu showed it to me long ago.”
Except B is wrong because he didn’t take the time to observe and listen long enough. His mind was too busy filtering what he saw and applying one of the patterns that are already ‘known’ because the mind longs for that sense of comfort that comes with ‘I already know this.’
But it isn’t true. There is infinite nuance. The hips turned in a different way. The step done in a different way. The intention, the forwardness.
When we are too busy judging and filtering, when our goal is to say ‘I already know that and it’s one of the X things I know well’ we cannot learn anything new.
And this is a recent discovery in my life that has given me tremendous joy. Among all ‘superpowers’ one can dream of, one that has erupted in my life as of lately as one of the most quiet and amazing ones imaginable is this. The art of simply quietly observing. And here’s the trick: refraining from judging, refraining from filtering. The more we can delay our filtering, the higher the chances we can learn something new.
We hear someone tell us something ‘new’ but before she or he has finished the sentence, our busy mind has already decided we already know this. And yes, we feel comfortable in this, but we just lost a wonderful opportunity to learn something new. A wonderful opportunity to grow.
Only in vulnerability can we grow. Only by embracing that ‘I don’t know this’ can I be open to learning something new. And even though it’s scary at first, it has rewards beyond words.
Through the Art of Observation, gradually and slowly, you’ll realize the answers to most questions are there. Quietly in plain view. Except you realize you can’t tell anyone because nobody wants to listen. Our minds much prefer to boast and defend themselves, to present the facade that we already know ‘everything.’ And there go millions of opportunities to learn and enjoy.
Even if you have trained for just a few months you have much to teach me. Come and show me and I will eagerly shut up and watch and listen, letting the wonder of something new hit me. Because it’s enjoyable, because I have no need to appear strong before anyone, since I am comfortable in myself the way I am now. Come and teach me, because there is joy in learning. And I know I don’t know anything.
I hear endless discussions about the usefulness of the forms, for example. 100 Martial Arts books say this, 100 Martial Arts books say that (completely opposite). But here’s the thing. Instead of a curse, the fact that life presents apparent evidence for opposite things is a blessing. Because life is constantly inviting us to watch and listen and learn by ourselves. To realize the truth of things through our own eyes, ears and sense of touch. And with that comes the reward of peace.
Imagine there is an argument about forms, or a particular ‘technique’ or a principle of Martial Arts. Now imagine I happen to be a witness to that argument. Do you know how I will distinguish those who KNOW – through personal experience – from those who only know intellectually – but not through personal experience and thus they feel subconsciously insecure? The ones who know are the most calm. They don’t feel the need to fight and argue to defend a ‘Truth.’
When you ‘see’ something you realize so many things, without seeking them. You realize that mostly the world is not interested in answers. The minds of people enjoy questioning. It SEEMS like they are asking for answers, but the answers are already there. The minds ask because they love to churn. They don’t – with some precious exceptions – want answers. Because God forbid if we didn’t have a reason to keep churning and questioning.
That’s why when I see someone truly open minded to learn, beyond labels and beyond their own preconceived ideas, I know it’s a precious miracle. It is rare but it happens, and it gives me great delight.
How do you develop this ‘superpower’? There is a way. Do you feel strongly about something? Are you opinionated when it comes to Martial Arts, politics or spirituality? Or anything at all! Then find a friend and have a debate with her or him. And take the position *opposite* to your current beliefs. Defend that which you so strongly think. Defend it rationally and calmly and without logical fallacies! Hats off to Randy King and his Podcast for this amazing practice!
With enough practice you’ll start realizing that things are not that clear cut. Black and white are rarely the colors of nature as it is here and now. And with that realization will slowly emerge a new practice. Now that you know that things are not so clear cut, and that you may not, after all, already know the truth, maybe you’ll start listening, watching, observing without judgment. Since you know you don’t know, why not listen? We don’t have to filter, we don’t have to judge.
Maybe forms are good, maybe forms are bad. Who cares? I have an entire lifetime ahead of me to listen, and watch, and SEE (vs. ‘think’) what it does TO ME.
I recently had a good friend ask me about my main Martial Arts stance. What is the angle of the feet? How wide does it have to be? Questions like this are a precious opportunity to take a step back. To throw the textbook out the window, so to speak.
Do you know what the goal is? And have you been giving tools to give yourself feedback? Then you can answer questions like this for yourself, and be brave enough to reach your own conclusions, regardless of what 100 ‘masters’ say about this in 100 books. If you ask me a question like this, I will never parrot someone else’s answer. No matter what. Not even my Teacher’s. The answer I give you will be my answer, based on my research and my conclusions, and I will encourage you to do that for yourself, too.
And there’s another unintended gift. A byproduct of the Art of Observation. If you can watch without judging and without taking things personally, then you can walk around this endless world of ours and realize it’s full of wonders. All there for you to enjoy unfolding. When the mind stops being too busy to judge then it opens itself to the sense of wonder!
Kick high, kick low, don’t kick. Use a weapon, use the empty hand. Do forms or don’t do forms. Because whatever you do I will be watching, learning from you, and smiling!
To know more about this and other Martial Arts and Life topics, you can view my Vlog and Podcast as well as these Martial Journal-related articles: Positivity in the Martial Arts-04/04/2018 by Scott Bolo and Knowing Why We Train by Dane Manson!
Francis can be contacted at francis.cordon@gmail.com, he is also an active Martial Arts YouTube Vlogger as well as the co-host of the Martial Arts Podcast ‘A Thousand Exits.’
- The Eternal Beginner - May 25, 2022
- The Art Of Enhancing Life - April 14, 2022
- The Art Of Observation - March 7, 2022
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