Being a Mom in the Martial Arts
I give credit to Larry Davis for first sparking my interest in training martial arts. His show ‘n’ tell in fourth grade was his karate picture (he was doing a full center split!). Wow, did I think that was so cool! Of course, that was also the age of TMNT movies and such, but Larry Davis made it something that I could do in real life, not just watch on screen.
I asked my parents if I could train, and was told no. “Girls don’t do that.”
I was disappointed, and spent a lifetime finding out that there were a lot of things that “girls don’t do.” I just didn’t care. I don’t like being told “no.”
When I finally signed up to take lessons myself, I was a single mom. My three boys were already training, and it was a great way for us to do something together. We formed an unbreakable bond through training. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
Even though two of my sons are taking a break from training, that bond is still there. We spent time kicking the crap out of each other for fun, which is REALLY hard to explain to anyone on the outside of the martial arts.
Because the boys started before me, they were senior to me in class. That gave them the chance to be “in charge” or “have authority” over me. We all know those are not exactly the words to explain it, but the point is, I learned from my kids. Our roles were reversed. It taught us all respect which was not a part of my home dynamic when I grew up. My parents were always in charge. We did things “because they said so.” There was no arguing. What a change it has been to let go of that concept. My kids are stronger for it.
This is only one of the many reasons I continue to train. As a mom, the martial arts have given me the strength to carry on when the weight of the world is trying to drag me down. From sleepless nights with young children, to not knowing how we were going to pay for both food and a roof over our heads, I fought to give my kids the best life possible.
The Modern Moms of Martial Arts Project
I see other moms who struggle and think that everything is supposed to be easy. Heck, I was one of them. But it’s not all chocolates and roses. Life is hard. And we can find the strength to hit back when life tries to take us down.
Moms need support. We need to know that we aren’t the only mom on the planet who struggles with things that should be natural. None of it is natural.
To help lend support to the other moms out there, I will be releasing a book, Modern Moms of the Martial Arts, a collection of stories from other moms who train in martial arts. It will be filled with stories of inspiration and recovery, finding that inner strength, and how moms need to balance the love and care they give to their families with love and care for themselves.
Most importantly, this collection will remind moms that they are not alone. Every story that will be shared will represent a mom reaching out her hand in support.
How You Can Be a Part of The Modern Moms of Martial Arts Project
- Introduction to each mom’s journey: Talk about how you got into martial arts, what inspired you, and the challenges you faced initially.
- Balancing motherhood and training: Discuss the struggles of finding time for training amidst the responsibilities of motherhood, such as childcare, household duties, and work commitments. Talk about the bond that was formed if you train with your child/children.
- Physical and mental benefits: Explore how martial arts training has positively impacted your physical health, mental well-being, confidence, and self-esteem.
- Overcoming obstacles: Share stories of overcoming obstacles and setbacks in training, whether it was injuries, self-doubt, time constraints, or something else.
- Empowerment and self-defense: Highlight the empowering aspect of martial arts for moms, including self-defense skills and the sense of security it provides.
- Role modeling for children: Discuss how training in martial arts sets a positive example for children, teaching them discipline, respect, perseverance, and the importance of physical fitness.
- Community and support networks: Explore the sense of camaraderie and support among moms who train in martial arts, both within the dojo and online communities.
- Setting and achieving goals: Share stories of setting and achieving personal goals in martial arts training, whether it’s earning belts, mastering techniques, or competing in tournaments.
- Mental toughness and resilience: Discuss how martial arts training builds mental toughness, resilience, and the ability to overcome challenges not only on the mat but also in everyday life.
- Incorporating martial arts philosophy into parenting: Explore how principles learned in martial arts, such as discipline, patience, and humility, can be applied to parenting.
- Cultural appreciation and respect: Highlight the cultural aspects of martial arts and the importance of respecting its traditions and origins.
- Inspirational mentors and role models: Share stories of inspirational instructors, mentors, or fellow martial artists who have made a significant impact on your journey. Discuss how mentors and instructors have helped you train while respecting and supporting your role as a mom.
- Finding support from family and friends: Discuss the importance of having a supportive network of family and friends who understand and encourage a mom’s martial arts journey.
- Mindfulness and meditation: Explore the mindfulness and meditation practices often incorporated into martial arts training and how they benefit moms in managing stress and anxiety.
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