Ich Bin Ein Berliner

The Reality Of Perception

I consider myself a fan of British comedy. I adore Monty Python, and I’m also a big fan of Eddie Izzard. Find his HBO Special “Dressed to Kill” sometime; he has a way of talking about language that is quite similar to George Carlin.

The example I am using today is a sketch from that special, about John F. Kennedy as he made his famous speech at the Berlin wall, “Ich Bin Ein Berliner”. You know, the one where he called himself a jelly donut. I can’t do the whole bit justice, it must be seen, but Izzard went on to sing the Star Spangled Banner without using a single real word–just jibberish–and did a pretty convincing job of it. His point? The way people perceive you is about 80% how you look, 15% how you sound, and only about 5% what you actually say. If you look the part and sound the part, most people will follow along regardless of what you’ve actually said.

What does this have to do with martial arts you ask? Bear with me; I’m getting there.

Looking The Part

Some time ago, my instructor and I were packing up our bags after class, and one of the adults had a question: “How do you feel about the fake stuff out there?” His question wasn’t one that was throwing shade on different styles, but the genuinely absurd things you see out there. This question was a little more pointed for me because just that week I watched a video on Facebook showing a petite athletic woman using self-defense techniques against a much larger man. She was confident, articulate, and used all the right buzzwords (follow through, push through, etc.). She had the look, she had the sound, but what she had to say I thought was ineffective. As a matter of fact, my instructor and I pulled that video up in the dojo and went through the video technique by technique to see how effective they would be against a determined attacker. The results weren’t pretty.

The response to the student’s question was along these lines. There’s not a lot of sorrow from me for people following the truly absurd things. They’ve bought into it, and for some reason choose to stick with it. I am almost certain that someone in their circle of friends or family has actually gone to them and said, “really?” And yet they continue.

It Gets Worse

What bothers me the most, however, are people who seek out actual information and see something like this video. The young woman is fending off an attacker, doing what appears to the untrained to be reasonable (80% how you look), sounding reasonable (15% how you sound), and then when someone has to use it in an actual self-defense scenario, they end up on the wrong end of things (the last 5%).

Now, for people who follow and train with the guy that gets slapped a pile of times with a spatula, they get what they signed up for. That’s not something I can help. (Full disclosure, I watched that thing about 100 times, and it’s still as funny as it was the first time.) I also realize that we can’t stem the onslaught of wrong information from the well-financed or well-intentioned.

What we can do within our own spheres of influence (family, friends, students) is to call them out for the jelly donuts that they are. That’s our responsibility. I’d say more, but it’s time to make the donuts.

What do you think about it? Let me know in the comments section below.