Adults… What stops adults from starting a traditional martial art?
There is a martial art school at every shopping center
There is a Taekwondo school on every corner. Almost every shopping center has a martial arts school. The most popular are Taekwondo and Karate schools. For some reason, adults usually only go there to drop off kids for a class or pick them up from after school care. I have learnt that an after school program is one of the best things parents can offer to their kids. But studying a traditional martial art doesn’t really appear exciting or interesting to most parents. Stuck behind a desk all day, parents become discouraged when they observe a class. The schools are also not seeing too many adults in classes. Joining your kids’ school might be an advantage – you have to be there with them anyway – so why not try something new?
It is known that practicing martial arts has many benefits. They are perfect for people wanting to learn self defense as well as lose weight and stay in shape. For kids, discipline and learning respect are huge advantages. Martial arts begin and end with respect.
Some stay
Ever since I joined my Taekwondo school I have heard some Masters say that adults usually quit after getting a black belt. At that point I was determined to prove them wrong but, I have to admit, I have had moments of doubt. However, I stayed and I have never regretted it. I have Met and trained with some great people.
One of them – Richard Stevens – agreed to share why he stayed: “I stayed because the journey is about me and my own physical and mental health. I learn from all, including the younger members; watching their energy and fearlessness and I learn and remember. I also have masters who work with me to ensure I am progressing. But I do get frustrated at the lack of focus and discipline of some younger members. It is not all, I have found my own voice to address these issues when they arise and other masters hold those individuals accountable, too. While it can be distracting at times, what they choose to do or not do in their class time does not directly impact my own workout and practice overall.”
Why do adults quit?
Some adults stick with it and some quit. Maybe one of the reasons is – and I think this is the big one – too many kids around us. Most of the time I was the only adult in class. Being a beginner, no belt or a white belt and way lower in ranks than your kid, might be too much for an ego. I admit, It was hard to stick with it.
I was training Krav Maga while studying Taekwondo. As of today, I added Judo. I tried Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and I enjoyed it a lot, too. All those were in addition to still learning Taekwondo. Many Masters believe that a Martial Artist should study more than one art. Is that because they are lacking something? Maybe.
As a Taekwondo person, I was lacking self defense. That’s why I started Krav Maga. At some Taekwondo schools, the fun part, self defense, a real one, starts after you’re a higher belt or even a black belt. Although Krav Maga is a good way to learn some self defense, I wouldn’t recommend it as the only system. Sometimes training Is very unrealistic and frankly useless. I don’t think as a civilian I need to learn a rifle defense. But real life scenario are very useful – how to defend yourself from an attack at a bar, while taking money out from an ATM, and so on. Taekwondo is also lacking a good ground work. Krav Maga offers some, but they are not as effective as Brazilian Jiu Jitsu or Judo.
Stick with it
Sticking with Taekwondo was worth it and I now work as a Taekwondo instructor. There’s so much to learn even after getting a black belt.
A lot of people don’t start, or quit after just a couple of classes, because it becomes difficult as they progress and are promoted to higher belts. For many those spinning head level kicks are enough to prevent from trying. Flexible kids are amazing at those. Still, In my opinion this shouldn’t keep anyone from joining your kids school. I do think there should be an alternate curriculum for adults. Less traditional, more realistic. Many schools, including the one I work at, do offer some modifications.
I remember how annoyed I was with all those kids when I was a student. I am surprised at how much I love working with kids. It’s a challenge, yes, but it’s great to be able to work with them, help them, and watch them improve.
For some people it’s annoying to have to listen to higher belts kids too. It’s another ego thing, just let them be higher belts, they have worked hard to get their dans!
Other reasons adults might quit or not start:
- Forms – Another thing that might look silly. Poomsae is not for everyone and some don’t have patience to memorize all the steps, kicks, and punches.
- Uniforms – the fact that you have to wear a uniform every time you train, doesn’t matter the season and the temperature.
- Yelling – for outsiders (including me), this seems like an unnecessarily silly, funny thing.
Not all adults quit
Some people do stay and are having fun with it. Just as I had, as soon as I stopped overthinking how much more flexible those kids are. This was honestly the reason why I started thinking about writing a book (and now you can purchase it on Amazon!).
Tony Del Mar, my friend and a huge Taekwondo enthusiast, explains why he started, and stuck with, Taekwondo:
“I started TKD after my children were grown and I got divorced. Martial Arts were something that fascinated me for most of my adult life. However, responsibilities got the majority of my time. I finally decided that its now or never and I went for it. I found, that despite my age, I am able to train hard and that the more effort I put into training, the better results I obtained. An excellent Master helped me immeasurable. As long as I keep obtaining results, I will continue training… at least another 10 years.” Now, he’s a second dan, has performed and won many tournaments, and just got back from training in Korea where he was a huge celebrity!
I will always try to convince adults to join a martial arts school and stick with it. It is worth it, there are many benefits, including more patience – which anyone with kids will admit they need. Doubts and bad days will come and go. But talk to any instructor or a Master and he/she will definitely agree with me.
I’d like to start a discussion here. I’m wondering if there is a time to change the curriculum or modified it for adults? Would that be unfair to younger people? I’m thinking more “real life” self defense that could start earlier. Many schools start teaching knife defense or even wrist grabs after a black belt. Or do you have an idea for a curriculum change? Leave a message below!
Editor’s note; for another perspective from an adult practitioner, check out the article Training with Younger Instructors by Martial Journal Contributor (and co-author of Anna’s book), Richard Bejtlich.
Anna is a co-author of a book: "Reach Your Goal. Stretching and Mobility Exercises for Fitness, Personal Training and Martial Arts" available on Amazon.
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Great story Anna. Do you think BJJ is a TMA? I wonder because there are so many adults in BJJ.
Well, when I’m thinking: traditional MA, I think TKD or karate. Anything with before and after school and summer camps 😉 Where would you place BJJ?
TMA for adults should be helping their goals. Some do it for exercise and probably don’t want to leave the studio with a bloody nose or black eye. And others want that. Kids need coordination, exercise, and discipline… so they need other things. Not an easy fix.
Great point. And agreed, not an easy fix.
I am the beginner among 3 sestagenarians at our school, having begun just 2 years ago. My instructors will say, ” Jerry, you can sit this one out. ” Usually, I politely ignore these kind overtures, but sometimes balk at doing 150 jumping jack’s or 30 pushups. I do what I can. Learning forms can be a challenge as well, but doing my best is what is stressed. My only opposition is the man in the mirror.
Hi Jerry, same here. I have begun Taekwondo as an adult, when I was told to sit something out, it piss… motivated me even more 😉 Thanks for taking the time to comment.
How Can you know what school of training fits you? I love the martial Arts, Never really found the right place.I had MasterGerald Warren, teaching of Green Dragon. And had terrible studies with Mantis training in China Town. Just not at ease anymore. I’m now 60 years old.
I just had a class with mostly 70+ year olds, all Vietnam era veterans. We don’t have the moves that the kids seem to do effortlessly, but enjoy our classes together and our commiserations over our aches and pains afterwards.
My advice would be to look for a school where you are encouraged to be YOUR BEST, whatever that might be. Belt testing is coming up at the end of the month so our instructors are preparing us now, refining technique and movement. I never, in my wildest dreams thought I would go so far in so small amount of time. I attribute this to the patience and encouragement of my instructors.
Thank you for your comment Jerry. This is amazing, what’s Martial Arts is for me. You train hard and you are a part of a great community!
Very informative article, Kids also can learn martial arts like what we do here in world karate in Fairfax. We teach both adults and kids to learn martial arts not just for self-defense but also to develop its physical and mental health
Your question about curriculum changes is a good one. However, it will depend on who the instructor/system/style is. I teach Chang-Hon TKD – the earlier, more traditional roots of TKD. Self-defense has been a major part of that style/system from its inception.
I own a school and have a curriculum that starts self-defense right at white belt – no point in training in martial arts if you don’t learn “self-defense” until after years of training. I also have knife & stick (or machete) defense that starts right away. It goes through simple stages at each belt or two, but it is thorough enough so someone has solid skill in this after a couple of years. I also include hand gun disarms prior to black belt but hold off on that until higher belts (prior to black, though).
My child students learn much of the same minus hand gun training and minor tweaks to the knife curriculum. I am also an instructor of Inayan Eskrima (currently only have adults & teens program), so we cover different material in there – but that is heavy on weapons training by nature.
There is no simple answer to your great questions. The biggest thing is that instructors need to humble themselves to become better instructors. Then we will see great improvements in the martial arts teaching world – all styles.
Thanks for your comment Brian! This actually sounds pretty awesome! I have some experience in Krav Maga and they do the similar stuff, more real life scenarios. Some people are not ok with that and don’t want kids to be around that. Some kids just want to do forms and kicks in the air. All good in my opinion, the fitness part is good for them as well, but we should try to add as much of that real life there as we can.
Great discussion 🙂 Thanks again 🙂
I’ve been wanting to learn Taekwondo for protection purposes. I guess you’re right, learning Taekwondo will never be easy, but aside from the self-defense, it will also teach me patience. I enjoyed reading your journey, and right now, it’s my time to look for a defense program where I’ll enroll.
Learning and retaining forms and executing some of the kicks has been the hardest for me. At 71, my memory and flexibility are not what they once were. My instructors don’t make comparisons, only stressing each student to do their personal best.