3 Rules to Surviving and Thriving Among the Young

I just got home exhausted from a great Taekwondo class, feeling pretty good about myself. I worked hard and I’m not as sore as I usually am. Not bad for a 53-year-old man! After a quick shower, I settle down in my chair and it’s time to wind down a bit and look for some extra inspiration on social media.

And there it is, right in my face.

Some young person with their foot shooting high into the air with a straight up sidekick! I scroll down a little and now I see a group of them defying gravity as they leap and break numerous boards at blinding speed. I put down my Smartphone and adjust the ice bag on my knee and sigh heavily. Welcome to the life of the 50-something martial artist, living among the young.

I should be happy to see young people engaged in something I love so much, shouldn’t I? Then why do these posts have a way of depressing me? A quick mental inventory reveals what the source of my discouragement is. These photos, combined with the feats of my younger classmates, fill my mind with the impossible wish to be young again. Facing the realization that my age has limited my performance can be discouraging, to say the least.

Those of us who practice a martial art and are in our fifties (and beyond) find ourselves submerged in the world of the young. We do this not as spectators going to a football game to cheer, but right alongside them. Together we are sweating, kicking, stretching and learning. The young are our classmates and they grossly outnumber us. This can often have a negative effect on us if we are not careful. This was part of my battle after entering my first Taekwondo class at age 50. Three and a half years later, through ups and downs, injuries and healing, on the road to finally earning my black belt, I learned a few things that I’d like to pass on to you.

Let’s have a look at how to not only survive but thrive among our younger classmates. And to that end, here are three rules to live by.

Rule 1: Don’t compare yourself physically to the young ones.

Comparing yourself to the youth’s physical stamina and capabilities only leads to your trying to keep up with them or becoming deeply discouraged. I know in your head you may feel like your body can still do anything, but the truth is you will get injured faster and recover slower.

One class I was performing simple team relays. I wanted to show my teammates they didn’t’ get stuck with the old guy so I gave it my all even when my legs started to get fatigued. The result was I fell and twisted my knee. This injury caused me to miss two months of classes and a promotion cycle. And when I finally made it back to class, I had to work hard to get back to something resembling normal.

Then whom should you compare yourself to?

You compare yourself to you. Not the person you see in the mirror, but the person you would be if you stayed home on the couch watching TV shows you forgot you already saw. Where would you be physically if you hadn’t become a martial artist?

Rule 2: Be responsible for your own training.

You may have looked around and realized most of your classmates are young enough to be your son or daughter. Some even fall into grandchild age. Don’t go there. Young instructors are used to teaching younger people. They do not necessarily know when you need to slow down, alter the exercise they are doing, or even stop for a moment to stretch. That’s when it’s time to put pride aside and be willing to adjust the exercises and drills to better suit you. A good instructor will not want you to injure yourself and will have no issue with you making these adjustments.

When I was healing from my knee injury, I often faced the instructor, bowed and stepped away from a challenging exercise to stretch or work on my own. I was fortunate and an assistant instructor often worked me through some exercises one on one. It’s not always easy to find that line between pushing our limits and causing an injury. Listen to your body and learn your limits.

Rule 3 Recognize your strengths.

Martial arts training is physical, there is no getting around that. But it is also mental and spiritual. Attributes like patience and the indomitable spirit to never give up are fostered by living years through the trials of life. And that, my friend, is what has brought us to the decision to defy the odds and enter martial arts at our age. It takes an abundance of both of those characteristics to truly succeed in any martial art. Often this takes the form of being able to practice better. For example, we don’t get bored repeating the same technique over and over again to perfect it. We don’t have to be told to put down our video game and go practice at home. Ever notice who is whining when the instructor calls out to stretch harder, do more sit ups, or hold up your leg longer? You have the grit, use it and watch yourself succeed!

Being a martial artist is so much more than being able to do a full split or kick out the ceiling lights. Having earned my black belt at the young age of 53, I know I’ve only begun my journey. When we keep our focus where it should be, the rewards are priceless and age truly is just a number.

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David Ianetta

David Ianetta is a 3rd Dan Taekwondo Blackbelt. At age 50 David returned to Korean Martial arts after a hiatus of over 35 years. He is the author of “From the Desk to the Dojang - A 50-year-old’s Taekwondo Journey” available on Amazon.com.

Latest posts by David Ianetta (see all)

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